When Relationships End: Tips To Help You Move On
When a relationship ends, it can feel a little like a death. A constant in your life is no longer there, and it’s hard to know what to do next. Whether you’re going through the end of a long term relationship or even a divorce, here are some tips that will help you move on.
Let Yourself Feel Your Pain
First of all, it’s important to let yourself feel your pain. It can be tempting to force yourself to move on quickly and to blink back tears when you feel sad, even if you’re at home by yourself, but allowing yourself to feel sad is an important part of the grieving process – and you do grieve the end of relationships, just like you would grieve a death. Don’t minimise the way you feel – if you let yourself feel your sadness now, it won’t ambush you at an even more inconvenient time in the future.
Talk About It
One of the best ways of processing trauma is to talk about it. If your friends ask you how you are, it’s important that you tell them – don’t plaster a fake smile onto your face and pretend that everything’s okay. Have productive conversations about the way that you feel – don’t rant about how terrible your ex is, because that won’t go anywhere, and outpourings of bitterness are exhausting to witness – and make sure you have people that you can express yourself honestly to. You could consider speaking to a therapist who can help you process your feelings in a healthy and productive way.
Get Legally Protected
It’s important that you talk to a lawyer to make sure that you’re legally protected. If you’re in a long term relationship, chances are you’ve made some big commitments to each other, whether that entails buying a place together, renting somewhere together, or even having children together. Disentangling your finances after a split can be tough, and figuring out a custody schedule can be even harder. Contact a family law firm like JWB Family Law that will be able to advise you on what your next move should be – they will let you know exactly what you’re legally entitled to so you don’t end up missing out.
Block Your Ex
One of the best ways to stay hung up on your ex is to stalk them on social media, so you need to stop yourself from doing that. Delete them from Facebook, block their Twitter account and Instagram profile – block their number if you no longer need to talk to them. Focusing on how they’re spending their time will stop you from living your own life fully.
Start Something New
Finally, it’s important to create a new and happy life for yourself. In relationships there’s a certain degree of compromise and now you no longer have those restrictions. Take yourself on the vacation that you’ve always longed to go on but that your ex would have hated. Cook with foods that you love and they disliked. Hang out with your friends, attend a dance class, be creative. After all, living well is the best revenge!
Moving on after a break-up is never easy, but these ideas should help you find a new and happy life.
